If a relationship progresses to a certain level, you start the process of moving in with your significant other. Several benefits come with this choice, including more time together and less money spent since you’re not maintaining two places.
Although the first days of cohabitation can feel like a sleepover party, the charm quickly fades when you start managing the furniture issues, annoying habits, and household chore division.
Before you start this process, we highly recommend using professional storage solutions for your extra belongings. Let’s call it “insurance for if things go bad” when you don’t have space to move all of your items in with your partner.
Once you have that issue settled, here are some tips that can make this process go smoothly.
How to Move In with a Partner Without Losing Your Mind
Even though love might be the basis of your decision to move in with a significant other, you must consider your finances. You don’t want your money in another person’s hands if things go south.
That’s why signing a pre-move prenuptial agreement. You’ll get legal protections with this contract because the court system typically treats unmarried couples as strangers if they split up while sharing a place.
Here are some additional ideas to consider.
1. Start the communication process early.
You’ll want to start talking about the expectations and rules that you have for each other right away. Who will be responsible for taking the trash out or the other chores that need to get done? What bills are your responsibility, and what ones will your partner pay?
If you can continue communicating from a respectful place, you’ll find that cohabitation can be a wonderful experience.
2. Keep up with your social life.
Although COVID-19 has thrown a wrench into our lifestyles and routines, you still deserve to spend time with your friends and family. When you move in with your significant other, it can feel like all of the focus stays on that person.
It helps to have an evening with the guys, go out with the girls, or have Sunday dinner with your parents to help you stay connected. You don’t want to get so intertwined with your partner that you lose sight of who you are.
3. Have a hard conversation.
If you expect this relationship to go the distance, moving in together is a natural place to have hard conversations about pets and kids. When you have a small one-bedroom apartment in NYC, is there enough space to start a family?
When your partner lives in a studio, can your St. Bernard share that apartment with both of you?
It is not unusual for some couples to find a new apartment together to ensure that there’s enough space for everything and everyone now – and in the future. You’re not relegated to your place or theirs.
4. Give it a trial run before going all-in.
If you haven’t tried living together yet, it sometimes helps to do a trial run with your partner instead of putting in everything right away. Consider moving in for a couple of weeks full-time while maintaining both residences.
You’ll get to see the lifestyle differences, morning routines, meal preparation, and other issues that can affect a relationship. If it doesn’t work for you right now, you can go back to your place (or send your partner back to their home).
That doesn’t mean you need to break up. It just says you’re in two different places right now.
5. Keep the sentimental items.
When you start consolidating your belongings, you’ll discover that some things are no longer necessary. Do you both need 12 of your favorite coffee mugs? Does your band t-shirt collection from every concert you’ve ever attended need to stay?
Some of the items can go into storage. Your sentimental things, like your grandmother’s favorite dreamcatcher, should have a place in your combined home. If your partner has a problem with you keeping them, you’ll need to evaluate why they have that perspective.
6. Create a space for yourself.
You deserve a space in your home that is 100% yours, without reservation. It doesn’t matter if you’re the one moving into a new place to be with your partner. Sharing is fun, but you need moments to find peace because the area reflects who you are. Don’t forget: your significant other also gets that privilege.
When you start living together, it helps to set boundaries early. If you can stick to them while respecting your partner’s space and needs, this time in your life can be an amazing experience!